Rwendo rwekusuwa

Kudzokorora kwe Kushungurudzika Rwendo: Kuwana yako nzira kuburikidza nekurasikirwa . NaDr. Kenneth J. Doka. Atria Mabhuku. 304 mapeji. $ 26.

Tose zvedu, pasina mubvunzo, tichava nenguva yekuchema. Tinorwadziwa kana mudiwa afa, patinorambana, takaremara, tikarasikirwa nebasa, tikarambana newatinodanana naye, tikatambura nhumbu. Kushungurudzika kunogona kurwadza, panyama nepfungwa. Asi zvinogona zvakare kubatsira. Sezvo isu tichirarama nekurasikirwa, Kenneth Doka anotiyeuchidza, tinogona kukura mukati uye kuburikidza neshungu.

In Kushungurudzika Rwendo , Dr. Doka, purofesa weGerontology paGraduate Chikoro cheKoreji yeNew Rochelle, mushumiri akagadzwa waLuther, uye mupepeti we Omega: Zvinyorwa zveRufu uye Kufa , inopa maonero ekunzwira tsitsi kufirwa senzira yeupenyu hwese. Doka anoongorora mashanu "mabasa ekusuwa": kubvuma kurasikirwa; kutsungirira kurwadziwa; kugadzirisa shanduko; kuchengetedza zvisungo; uye kuvaka zvakare kutenda uye / kana uzivi. Nekuda kwekuti munhu wega wega akasarudzika, Doka anosimbisa, “hapana imwe nzira chaiyo yekusangana neshungu. Kana kushungurudzika hakuna nguva. ”

Zano raDoka rakavakirwa zvakanyanya pabasa rake semupi wezano pakufirwa. Zvizhinji zvacho - "dzivisa kurova avo vakakupoteredza, kudzinga vamwe kure, kudzikisira tsigiro" - zvinoenderana. Uye, pane dzimwe nguva, Doka's inodzokororwa thesis (hapana imwe saizi-inokodzera-nzira yese yekuchema) iri muhondo neyekuvakwa kwebhuku rake. "Haugone kuenzanisa kurasikirwa kwako nekurasikirwa kwevamwe, kana maitiro ako kana mhinduro kune izvo zvevamwe," anonyora. Mushure mekuongorora zviitiko zvevakawanda vevatengi vake, zvakadaro, Doka anoti "kunzwisisa dzimwe nzira dzekugadzirisa kunogona kukutendera kuti utsungirire kurasikirwa uye kukura kubva pakuri."

Uye, pamwe zvisingadzivisike, mune "mabhuku sei," kutsunga kwaDoka kwekusatonga (haakwanise kuzviunza iye pachake kuzopa zano pamusoro pekutsvaga masvikiro) kunopera. Achiratidza manzwiro, anodaro (achidaro tsumo yechiChinese), "zvinotungamira pakurwadziwa kwechinguva uye kuzorora kwenguva refu; kudzvinyirira kunotungamira mukuzorora kwenguva pfupi uye kurwadziwa kwenguva refu. ”

Zvinofadza, akati wandei ekurudziro mu Kushungurudzika Rwendo zvinobatsira. Doka anopa zano vanhu vanosarudza kuti vaise mubereki kana sekuru kana ambuya kana sekuru vakaremara munzvimbo inochengetwa vakwegura kuti vagadzirise "kushungurudzika kwavo kwekutarisira" nekuratidza nemamiriro ezvinhu angave akaomarara kuenderera mberi nekuchengetwa kwemusha. Nekugadzira iyo chaiyo kurota, iine zvinhu zvinomiririra kurasikirwa (mubhedha usina chinhu, gungwa raunofarira), Doka anoratidza, vanochema vanogona kusangana nekunzwa uye voona nyaya dzisina kugadziriswa. Anokurudzira kuti avo vakarasikirwa newavakaroorana naye kana mwana vafunge kukumbira rubatsiro vasati vasarudza kuti uye riini uye nekurasa "zvinhu zvekusuwa" (mbatya, matoyi, kutakura mabhokisi). Doka rinopa zano vanochema kuronga zororo, izvo zvinogona kunetsa, pane kupa sarudzo kune vamwe vanofunga zvakanaka. Uye vanochema, anonyora, vanogona kugadzira "dzimwe tsika," kubva pamusangano wekuyeuchidza kugarisa vanochema avo daro kana chinzvimbo chakarambidza kuenda kumariro, kuenda kuchiitiko chegore negore chekusimudzira mari yerubatsiro muzita remunhu akafa.

Zvinonyanya kukosha, Doka, uyo akaunza pfungwa ye "kushungurudzwa kusingabvumirwi" muna 1989, anotiyeuchidza kuti kumwe kurasikirwa - kufa kwewaimbova murume kana mudiwa akavharana ngochani; mukoma akaiswa mutirongo; kuramba uchishaya mbereko; kurasikirwa nekutenda kwechitendero - hazviwanzo kuzivikanwa kana kutsigirwa nevamwe. Vanhu vane kushungurudzika kwakadzoserwa, iye anosimbisa, kazhinji vanotambura chinyararire, uye vane zvishoma kana vasina mamiriro ekuti vanzwisise kana kugadzirisa maitiro avo.

Kushungurudzika, Doka anodzokorora, "haisi zvakanyanya nezvekufa asi nezvekurasikirwa." Anokumbira vaverengi vake kuti vawane nyaradzo, sezvaakaita, mukucherechedzwa kweumwe wake mushakabvu akafa, Richard Kalish: "Chero chipi zvacho chauinacho unogona kurasikirwa nacho; chero chinhu chaunonamatira, unogona kupatsanurwa nacho; chero chaunoda chingabviswa kwauri. Asi kana pasina chauri kurasikirwa nacho, hauna kana chaunowana. ”

Pakupedzisira, Dr. Doka vanowedzera, vanochema vachatarisa kumashure vopemberera rwendo rwehupenyu hwavo, rwakashanduka sezvarwakaita nekuti vakapindura nenzira dzakanaka kurasika (kwavo) kwavakaona.