Nyaya yekurerwa uye Reactive Attachment Dambudziko

Dr. T havaigona kuve vakafadzwa zvakanyanya nekufambira mberi kwaJulia. Pamwedzi gumi nemasere, mwana wangu aive mumakore makumi mapfumbamwe nemashanu ^th percentile yehuremu hwake. Akanga achitaura, achifamba, mhasuru yake toni yaive yakanakisa. Zviratidzo zvese zvakanaka zvemwana akagamuchirwa chete gumi nemana mwedzi yapfuura kubva kunherera yeSiberia.

Dr. T vanoshanda mukurapa vana vanogamuchirwa pasi rese. Munguva yekushanya kwechitatu kwemwanasikana wangu, akakurudzira yechipiri majekiseni emishonga nekuti aisavimba neaakagamuchira muRussia. Akandibvunza kuti Julia aive achidya sei, akatarisa pamusoro pema bifocals ake kuti averenge chati yake. Ndakamuudza kuti ari pane organic, chikafu chose, chisiri chenyama. Iye akati, "akanaka," uye nekamwe kaziso muziso rake, akawedzera, "Anoratidzika kunge akanaka. Uri kuita basa rakakura. Mumudzosere mumwedzi mitanhatu. ”

Paakatanga kutsvedza kubva kuimba yekuongorora ndakakakama, "Mira, ndine mubvunzo."

Akanditarisa nemoyo murefu.

"Ndinoziva sei kuti Julia haana kumira zvakanaka, unoziva, mupfungwa, nemumoyo?"

Akambomira.

Ndakamutsanangurira kuti mwanasikana wangu anokosha akatsvukuruka, mwana akajeka, haanamatire kwandiri kana kunditarisa mumaziso kana kushivirira kubatwa. Haasvike ruoko rwangu kana kuti ndimuverenge kana kutamba naye. Iye ane mhando manic, ndakadaro, ndichifunga kana iro raive izwi rakanaka kushandisa. Haachina zororo kana achinge adzorwa mubhedha kana mutyairi. Haatombo zorora achimbundira zvinyoro nyoro. Ari kudzora uye akaoma. Kwete dzimwe nguva. Nguva dzose.

Pasina kupotsa kurova akati, "Unogona kunge uchitsanangura chimwe chinonzi Reactive Attachment Disorder." RAD, sezvandaizozoona gare gare, chirwere chinoonekwa muvana vazhinji vakarerwa, kunyanya kubva kuRussia neEastern Europe. Vacheche vane dambudziko rekubatanidza vabereki vavo vokurera nekuti vakashungurudzwa kana kuregeredzwa, uye vanoona mubereki akarerwa semumwe muchengeti anogona kuvasiya kana kusarega. Kunyangwe ivo vari vadiki, pasi penzvimbo ivo vanotenda ivo vega vavanogona kuvimba navo ivo pachavo. Mamiriro akaomarara, asingawanzo kunzwisiswa navana chiremba vazhinji.

Dr. T vakati zvinogona kunge zvakanyanyisa kukurumidza kuongororwa. Mudiki waJulia. Akabva anditarisa, ndokuona kutya kumeso kwangu, ndokuwedzera, “Usanetseke. Une nguva. ”

Kuti ndipedze kutya kunorwadza, ndakaramba ndichizviudza kuti “Tine nguva, Tine nguva. Julia achabatana. ”

Ini nemurume wangu tese taive makumi mana patakatora Julia. Ndiri mutori wenhau. Ndiye gweta remudyandigere. Hazvina kumboitika panguva yekutora vana muna 2003 hapana munhu akataura nezve Reactive Attachment Disorder kwatiri. Ndakatanga kuzvinzwa zvichitaurwa pataive muSiberia. Vamwe vaviri vakatora mwana wavo wechipiri weRussia panguva imwechete isu taive tichitora Julia akanzwa kunetsekana pavakasangana nemwanakomana wavo mucheche nekuti mwana haana kutarisa kumeso uye aive asingateereri. Ndakanga ndisingazive zvakakwana kuti nditeerere maitiro avo akavhunduka. Ndakanzwa mutsara zvakare apo ndaitaura kushamwari yemhuri, chiremba wezvepfungwa, asi iye aitaura achirova, uye akatarisa pasi pamwana wangu akanaka, ndokuti, "Usanetseke. Anoratidzika kunge akanaka. ”

Kunyangwe mushure mekutaura kwaDr. T kwechirwere ichi, ndakanga ndisina kugadzirira kubvuma tsananguro iyi, kunyangwe zvaizodai zvakatsanangura chikonzero nei ndainzwa kusakwana saamai. Zvinotora mamwe makore maviri, apo Julia aive nemakore mana uye achiwana kurairirwa kwemutauro, kuti ini nemurume wangu Ricky tiite iro basa redu rehupenyu kuti tinzwisise Reactive Attachment Disorder, uye kuti tiite zvataifanira kuita kununura mwanasikana wedu kubva nzvimbo iri kwayo yoga yakabatwa.

Kunyanya, zvakatora zuva rakaipa kukonisiti yechikoro chekireshi kutora danho rekutanga raidikanwa kushandura hupenyu hwedu, kunyatso "Kununura Julia Kaviri," sekudanwa kunoita bhuku rangu. Munguva yekudzokorora ndakapunzika uye ndikachema nekuti ndakaona kuti kusurukirwa uye kudzingwa uye kusarudzika mwanasikana wangu. Julia akatadza kuimba pamwe neboka. Hunhu hwake hunovhiringidza hwakamanikidza mudzidzisi kumutora kubva pachikuva uye kubuda mumba. Izvi zvinogona kunge zvisinganzwike sechiitiko chisina kujairika kumwana mudiki-asi akaiswa muchirevo, ndakanzwisisa ipapo uye ipapo, ini ndaifanira kupindira.

Ini nemurume wangu takabatana pamwechete kuti tiverenge zvese zviri mumabhuku, zvidzidzo zvekurapa nepamhepo izvo zvataigona pane chirwere. Kadhi redu reBhingo rakanga rakazara. Julia aive poster mwana weRAD. Takaita nharo yakasimba uye kuzvipira kwekuziva kubatsira mwanasikana wedu uye kuzviita mumhuri. Raiva basa redu rezuva nezuva. Takadzidza kuti kurera mwana anonetsekana kubatanidza zvinoda simba risingabvumirane reubereki - mamwe aivhiringidza nekushamisa mhuri neshamwari. Vanhu vakatadza kunzwisisa kana isu taizopindura kukakavadzana kwaJulia nechiso chekupusa poker pane kumufadza. Taiseka apo aishungurudzika kusvikira avasiya, uye ndokuenderera mberi sekunge vasina kumboitika nekuti vana veRAD vakapindwa muropa nemhirizhonga uye zvakakosha kubvisa mutambo. Ivo havana kunzwisisa kuti Julia aisada kupa kumbundira uye isu hatina kumukumbira kudaro. Nerubatsiro rwekutsvagisa uye nyaya dzenyaya, taive nebhokisi rekushandisa. Mamwe mazano aikosha, mamwe akatadza. Dzimwe nzira dzakashanda kwechinguva. Takanga tichigara mukati merabhoritari. Ndaiziva rombo rakanaka randaive naro rekuva nemumwe wangu saRicky nekuti michato yakawanda uye dzimba zvakaparadzwa nedambudziko rekutora vana vakaoma.

Nekufamba kwenguva, paive nekubatana kwakawanda naJulia. Zvaisave hazvo rudo uye kudziya pakutanga asi zvaifamba munzira kwayo. Isu tanga tichimukwevera kunze. Akave anokwanisa kuratidza kutsamwa pane kusava nehanya. Sezvo hunyanzvi hwekutaura hwaiwedzera, takave nemukana wekugona kumutsanangurira kuti tinomuda uye hatimbofa takamusiya. Kuti isu takanzwisisa kuti zvaityisa sei kuti iye adiwe nemunhu mukuru uye kuti aive akachengeteka. Isu takamudzidzisa manzwiro ekusununguka patakamutarisa mumaziso, uye tikamudzidzisa kuita zvakafanana. Kunzwisisa kurwadziwa kwaakaitwa kwakavhurawo moyo wangu uye kwakaita kuti ndiwedzere kunzwira tsitsi, uye ndikurudzirwe kuve amai vake.

Kufambira mberi kwakatora nguva — uye basa rekuramba wakasungwa nemwana akakuvara ibasa rehupenyu-hwese. Julia akabuda munzvimbo ine njodzi aine makore mashanu kana matanhatu. Akazunza ngowani yake nezvombo zvake. Akandirega ndikava amai vake. Ini ndinokudza kuvimba ikoko nekurangarira, zuva rega rega, mazuva ese, kurwisa kwaanoita madhimoni asinganzwisisike uye kuti hondo yake ine simba rakadii uye ichagara iri sei.

Pazera remakore gumi nerimwe, iye anoshamisa kwandiri. Haisi yake chete ace manzwiro ekusetsa ayo anomugonesa kutora mifananidzo yemhando yepamusoro kana matambiro aari kuita violin kana kuita zvakanaka muchikoro. Kubudirira kwake kukuru kubvumira rudo mukati. Kunyange chiri chimiro chechipiri kumhuri zhinji, kwatiri kukunda.

Copyright Tina Traster