Consensual Isiri-Chibvumirano: Kutsvaga Kunetsa Miganhu

Mumakore achangopfuura, hurukuro ye "kubvumirana kusabvumirana," kana "CNC," yanga ichiwedzera kuwanda munyika yekink uye sadomasochism (BDSM). Pfungwa dzeCCC ndedze kuongorora kwesimba, uye eroticization yekusiya zvachose simba rese, uye kuzviisa zvizere mumaoko emumwe. Nepo pfungwa iyi ichityisa vamwe, kune vamwe kuti kutya kunoturikira mukumhanyisa kune simba.

Sadism uye masochism inotsanangura vanhu vanoita kana kupa kana kugamuchira kurwadziwa, sechikamu chebonde ravo repertoire. Tsvagiridzo yemazuva ano ikozvino inoratidza kuti hunhu hwekutsvaga-kunakidzwa, kuwedzera, uye kuvhurika kuti uwane ruzivo hwakakosha hunhu hunokwezva vanhu kuita hunhu hwepabonde seBDSM (Brown, Barker & Rahman, 2019; Wismeijer & van Assen, 2013). Sezvinongoita vamwe vanhu vanonamira kuenda ku "adrenaline" - mhando dzekuvaraidza senge skydiving nepo vamwe vachisarudza kuruka, vamwe vanhu vanokwezva kune zvakanyanya kukurudzira maitiro ezvepabonde, nepo vamwe vachida chinyararire kugadzira rudo.

Hunhu hwepabonde hunosanganisira kurova uye zvekumanikidza, hasha, kana hutongi zvakajairika uye hazvibatanidzwe nehurwere kana kusagadzikana kwepamoyo (semuenzaniso, Joyal, 2015). Kazhinji, muBDSM maitiro, kune vanhu vanoita mukurumbira, kuzvishingisa, hasha, kana maitiro ekuranga. Kune vamwe, kutonga kwepfungwa kana "misoro yemusoro" chinhu chakakomberedza chechiitiko, icho chinozviisa pasi chinomanikidzwa kusangana nemanzwiro akasimba, ekutya, kushushikana, kana kunyangadza, nepo muchirevo chehukama hwakavimbika, hwekutaurirana, uye hwekubvumirana.Ipo BDSM neCNC zvinowanzo kuve zvepabonde, maitiro aya dzimwe nguva anongobatanidza kutsvaga kwesimba, pasina kusangana kwakanyanya.

Kubvumidzwa kune sadomasochistic maitiro kuri kugamuchira izvozvi tsvagurudzo yekutarisa (semuenzaniso, Carvalho, Freitas & Rosa, 2019), uye kune akati wandei mamodheru kana masisitimu emvumo anoshandiswa muBDSM, kusanganisira: "Yakachengeteka, Sane uye Consensual," "Risk Aware Consensual Kink , "" Kuchengeta, Kutaurirana, Kubvuma uye Kuchenjerera, "uye" Kuenderera Mberi "(Santa Lucia, 2005; Williams, Thomas, Prior & Christensen, 2014). Vanhu vanotora chikamu muBDSM yakarongeka vanowanzo kuve vanoziva nezve zvakasarudzika zvemvumo, uye vane hunyanzvi hwekutaurirana mvumo (Eg Dunkley & Brotto, 2019), kunyangwe kutyorwa kwemvumo uye kushungurudzwa pabonde kuchiri kuitika mukati memapoka aya. "Safewords" chikamu chekutaurirana kwechiitiko cheBDSM, icho vanhu vanoratidza nzira (izwi kana chiratidzo chisiri chemazwi) mavanopedzisa zviitiko kana vakashungurudzika, uye zvinovabvumidza kuti vati "kwete" uye kuramba kana kurwa. , pasina kupedza chiitiko.

"Kubvumirana kusabvumirana" kunotsanangura kuita zviito zvinogona kusanganisira kuita-kutamba maitiro asingabvumirane, kana zvinogona kusanganisira kutaurirana maitiro ehupombwe apo mumwe wako anobvuma kusiya mvumo pane mamwe maitiro kana hukama. Semuenzaniso, izvi zvinogona kusanganisira vanhu vanorondedzera kune wavanodanana naye kana wavanogona kudanana naye ivo vanofungidzira nezve kubiwa uye kubatwa chibharo uye vamwe vacho vanobvuma kuita izvi seyemutambo-mutambo muhupenyu chaihwo, kuti vazadzise fungidziro inodiwa. "CNC" inotsanangura nzira iyo vanhu vanobvumirana kutaurirana pamberi pekuti izvo mu-izvo-zvenguva pfupi maitiro ekuzvibata uye kutamba-mutambo kwaizosanganisira. Kubvumirana kusingabvumirwi kunomiririra chimiro chevanhu vanoisa mutoro uye kutonga mumawoko emumwe munhu uye kuvakoka kuti vasundire munhu kupfuura miganho yavo kana kutora mutoro wekukunda zvipingamupinyi zvemukati zvekuzviisa pakuita hunhu hunodiwa. Consensual isingabvumire, mukukosha, inoratidza fomu yakanyanyisa yekuratidzira kwekushaya simba.

Pane hurukuro shoma yeCCC mukutsvaga uye zvekuchipatara mabhuku. Pfungwa inoenderana ye "kubata chibharo kutamba fungidziro" yakave yakatsvakurudzwa zvakanyanya, neongororo inoratidza kuti yakajairika zvakanyanya. Zvidzidzo zvakasiyana zvinoratidza kuti pakati pe30-60% yevakadzi vanotaura zvekufungidzira zvekubatwa chibharo, kubatwa chibharo, kana kutorwa pabonde vasingadi, pamwe nehafu yekuzivisa kuti fungidziro dzakadai dzinomutsa uye dzakanaka kwavari (semuenzaniso, Bivona & Critelli, 2009) . Iko kune zvishoma ruzivo nezve kuti vangani vakadzi vanoshandisa dzakadai fungidziro mune yavo pabonde maitiro sekutamba-kutamba. Vakadzi vazhinji vanotya kuti kugovana fungidziro dzakadai kunogona kutungamira kwavari kubatwa chibharo, kana kuvanhu vanotenda kuti vanonyatsoda kusangana nekushungurudzwa pabonde, izvo zvavasingaite (Bivona & Critelli, 2009). Kana vanhu vakaroorana vakaedza kubatanidza kubata chibharo-kutamba fungidziro mune yavo pabonde maitiro, zvinogona kunge zvakaomarara, zvakazara, asi kazhinji zvinopa mubayiro uye zvakanaka chiitiko. (Johnson, Stewart & Farrow, 2019)

Sangano reNational Coalition Rerusununguko Rwepabonde rakaita ongororo yevanhu vakabatanidzwa muBDSM kuti vaongorore huwandu uye hunhu hwekutyora kwemvumo mukati mevaya vanoita BDSM. Pakati pevanopfuura zviuru zvina vakapindura, 29% vakataura nhoroondo yekutyorwa kwemvumo, kubva pakubata nekubata kusvika kune isingabvumirwe kupinda kwepabonde. Makumi mana muzana vakataura kuti vakanga vazvipira kuita zviitiko zveCCC nemaitiro, umo "munhu mumwe kana vanhu vazhinji vanosiya kodzero yekubvisa mvumo kwenguva yese yechiitiko." Pakati peavo vakapinda muCNC, chete 14% yakashuma yavo yekutanga-nhaurirano miganho yakanga yatyorwa muchiitiko cheCNC kana hukama, yaive hafu yemutero wekutyora kwemvumo kwakataurwa mumuenzaniso mukuru. Chete 22% yevanhu vanoita tsika dzeCCC vakashuma kuti vakasangana nekutyorwa kwemvumo chero nguva, zvichienzaniswa ne29% yesamuenzaniso zvachose. Vanyori vanoti "hurukuro yekuwedzera nekutaurirana zvinotora kuita muCNC ndiyo imwe yekiyi yekuwana mvumo yakazara." (Wright, Stambaugh & Cox, 2015, peji 20)

Hukama hwe "Tenzi-muranda" inzira yakasarudzika yehukama husingabvumirane hwehukama hweBDSM, uhwo vanhu vanotaurirana hukama hwekubvumirana umo mumwe mudiwa anobvumidza mumwe kudzora zvese zvehupenyu hwake. Hukama hwevatenzi nemuranda hazviwanzo, asi zviripo, uye zvakadzidzwa muna2013 naDancer, Kleinplatz, naMoser. Vakaona kuti nekubatanidza zviitiko zveupenyu hwezuva nezuva zvakadai semabasa epamba uye zvezuva nezuva musimba kusiyanisa zvinhu zvehupenyu hwavo, vatori vechikamu vakawedzera miganho yezvavanofarira BDSM kupfuura zvekuita bonde chete. Kunyangwe paive nemafungiro uye pfungwa ye "kuzviisa pasi zvizere," "varanda" avo vakataurirana vachibvumirana vasingabvumirane vachiri kushandisa rusununguko pazvavaida kuzviitira zvakanakira ivo. Vanenge hafu ye "varanda" mune ino ongororo vakatsanangura kuti vakafanoziva chero kugona kuramba zvirevo kubva kuna tenzi wavo, kana vachinge vapinda muhukama hwavo. Makumi manomwe nemana muzana "evaranda" vakashuma kuti vaive vaita hunhu hwaimboita kunge husinga fungidzike kwavari, sezvo ivo "vakasundirwa kupfuura zvavasingakwanise" natenzi wavo.

Consensual isingabvumirane, tenzi-muranda hukama, kubata chibharo-kutamba fungidziro, uye BDSM mune zvese zvikamu zvezvinonyanya kufarirwa online hurukuro mu online social media. Nehurombo, sezvinhu zvese zviri online, idzi nhaurirano dzinogona kusanganisira zvakashata kana zvisirizvo ruzivo sezvavanoita zvine hutano kana zvakanaka mazano uye zvinhu. Vanachiremba vezvepabonde uye varapi vakaita seni vanowanzo sangana nevanhu vane ruzivo nezve maitiro eBDSM, CNC, kana dzimwe nzira dzepabonde dzakabva zvachose kubva pamhepo zvinyorwa, uye zvine zvakawanda zvekufungidzira uye zvisina kunaka ruzivo kana maitiro.

Kunzwisisa kwekiriniki uye kwesainzi kwehuwandu hwevanhu, hunhu, uye etiology yemvumo yekubvumirana isiri-mvumo yekuita bonde iri mucheche. Kutsvagisa nebasa remakiriniki rinotenderedza zvinhu izvi zviri kuenderera mberi, asi iyi nharaunda yehunhu hwepabonde iri kuchinjawo sezvairi kukura, zvichiita kuti zvive zvakaoma kufungisisa zvizere kana furemu. Zviripachena kuti vanhu vazhinji vanofungidzira nezvekuva mune dzepabonde mamiriro avanotiza kana kupedzisa chiitiko. Vashoma vanhu vanoita maitiro akadaro muhupenyu chaihwo kuburikidza nekutamba-kutamba, zvichienzaniswa nekufungidzira, asi zvinoita sekunge zvisingawanzo kuita kudaro. Kuitwa nemvumo, kuzviziva, kutaurirana, uye kutaurirana, zvinoita sekunge kubvumirana maitiro asiri ekubvumidza kuita zvebonde kunogona kuve hutano uye hunogutsa hwebonde kune vamwe vanhu, uchivatendera kuti vawedzere miganho yavo yepabonde.

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Johnson, Stewart & Farrow (2019) Mukadzi Rape Kufungidzira: Kufungidzira Dzidziso uye Kliniki Mafungiro Ekuzivisa Maitiro, Zvinyorwa zve Couple & Relationship Therapy, DOI: 10.1080 / 15332691.2019.1687383

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Williams, Thomas, Pamberi & Christensen, (2014). Kubva "SSC" uye "RACK" kuenda ku "4Cs": Kuunza Sisitimu nyowani yeKutaurirana BDSM kutora chikamu. Elektroniki Zvinyorwa Zvevanhu Zvepabonde, Vhoriyamu 17, Chikunguru 5, 2014

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